[[Erasure]]
I’d beg God to enlighten me.
I’d beg God to enlighten men.
I’d beg God to condemn me.
I’d beg God to condemn men.
I’d beg God to see me.
I’d beg God to see men.
I’d beg God to believe me.
I’d beg God to believe men.
I’d beg all to believe (in) me,
But there is no response.
I see God in others,
But I do not see him in myself. [[There]]
I enjoy seeing others suffer. I would like others to suffer as much as I have. That is why I would say winter is my favorite season: most people feel awful, so I do not have to feel so alone in being alone; I do not have to hate myself as much because most people are at least suffering.
Well, I guess I’d say I prefer my left arm and hand; I would not want to corrupt the arm and hand I use for the most significant actions. Also, I’m attracted to left handed persons; maybe it is a projection.[[Cogdis]]
[[There]]
[[Freeverse]]
Letting my
Heart go numb.
Sensing that
Too soon
A wound
Would be
Bleeding
Needing to leave
The page blank.
Season
Of silence
Under
Its bandage of snow
Is healing. [[There]]
[[Freeverse]]
[[N]]
You may sip and suckle
Nectar from the rounded
Basin within the
Flowers’ crevasses;
Slowly – however, –
Will you realize
It is none sweeter
Than the fainting blood
Trapped inside your
Limbs’ chambers. [[Sickle Supple]]
[[N]]
there is a secret. looking for my childhood around the Palisades. missed it. teeth were discovered in uncle’s yard. he sang falsettos.
on 28th street. too close. he told me. he was right. I didn’t see inside his liver, which was like mine. tinges of red, white.
to himself, he would talk to anyone. I tried suicide but it didn’t work. his hand shook. down 8th street, at 21st. near the river, my window tap, wasn’t safe in the middle of the day in a world like this one.
snow. my soul leaps, something I’ve heard: bliss. in winter, the secret: if you’d lived, you’d be now beside me.
[[N]]
[[Cogdis]]
1. The peak is not far-off;
2. The rungs of the ladder lead me one leg closer counted by each oomph I make.
3. Will I get there before it’s too late?
4. The foreign frost glazes over my body like a hook of meat in a freezer.
5. My hands feel as if they’ve frozen off.
6. I can’t feel.
7. It’s dark now: pitch-black fire blows through the camp;
8. Blinded by the frost’s breath.
9. Small homes away from home; thousands of miles away from family.
10. You can’t help but feel lonely in a campsite of like-minded people.
11. Either you die out here in the blazing cold, or you suffer long enough to summit:
12. That’s only one half of the hell we subject ourselves to.
13. A small hope to return home.
14. An even greater hope to stand on top of the world.
15. A man’s vague understanding of the oyster he calls his own.
16. How have we come so far, yet it’s as if we’ve barely moved an inch?
17. The oxygen tanks we’re given only amount to regulate our breathing;
18. They, however, do not regulate our mental state.
19. My dear friend, we’ve come this close to accomplishing what you set out to do.
20. Elliot.
21. Years passed since your death; I see your face in this endlessly blinding bliss.
22. Where your body lies, I will never hope to find it.
23. My mind wanders in times like these.
24. I’ve come to hate myself.
25. The pinch of reality gives way: the night’s close.
26. Either set up camp, or push forward through the night.
27. A storm.
28. A string of men and women, two of whom had lost a partner during the expedition already.
29. Walking like ants on a log, we make our sightless way through the night holding onto dear life’s rope.
30. We are strong together.
31. However, we cannot rely on one another as much as we would like to.
32. Acknowledging each person is not only carrying themselves, but the weight of fear as well.
33. All who attempt it must recognize death and thusly sign their lives over to the mountain.
34. Once you touch foot at first camp:
35. You’re gone.